Sarah Palin might run for Don Young’s House seat, proving she learned nothing in 2008

WASHINGTON, DC - APRIL 14: Former Governor Sarah Palin speaks during the "Climate Hustle" panel discussion at the Rayburn House Office Building on April 14, 2016 in Washington, DC. (Kris Connor/Getty Images)

Watch for yourself.


BOLLING: “Let me ask you right here on this show, and we’ve been friends a very long time. Are you ready to announce a run for that seat, that Don Young’s seat for the House of Representatives from Alaska?”

PALIN: “Oh my goodness, think of those huge shoes that are to be filled when we consider Don Young’s longevity and his passion, his love, his fighting spirit for our wonderful state of Alaska and for the nation as a whole. If I were asked to serve in the House and take his place, I would be humbled and honored and I would. Yeah, in a heartbeat I would. We’ll see how this process is going to go in terms of filling that seat, but it would be an honor.”

BOLLING: “Well, I will tell you folks. There it is, you heard it here first. Sarah Palin would be a great, a great addition to the U.S. House of Representatives.


Governor, as a friend of yours for a very long time, I would love to see you in some of those congressional hearings with the left. I can’t imagine, their heads would be spinning. I’d love to see that. You up for that challenge?”

PALIN: “Well, you know, when you have nothing to lose. Kind of like President Trump, when he came in to … in one sense you have everything to lose, as Trump gave up so much. But on the other hand, you know, when the media has already clobbered you as bad as you can get clobbered, and the haters, you’re not going to change their mind. But you have faith that there are enough Americans to understand where you’re coming from, your love for the country, your servant heart. Yeah, I think that there are enough Americans who understand what we need, and when I have nothing to lose, as is the case today, I think it would be good for my family even, um, yeah, I’d serve.”

Wait, what was that about word salads? Because that there was an Old Country Buffet salad bar, with a mesh sneeze guard. And, granted, Palin does strongly evoke American patriotism, but only because she so frequently sounds like a bald eagle with a flagpole up its ass.

I mean, come on. Sarah Palin is the answer to a question no one asked. And, yes, I do realize Eric Bolling just asked it, but I stand by my original statement.

Don Young served nearly half a century in Congress. Sarah Palin served part of one term as Alaska’s governor before abruptly resigning to chase her VP dreams. House members serve two-year terms, so it’s anyone’s guess whether she would finish even one of those. But do Alaska residents really want to take that chance?  

I do agree with Bolling on one thing, of course: She would make liberals’ heads spin. I can imagine most of us would look a bit like industrial vomit sprinklers whenever she saw fit to regale us with one of her scintillating dead-moose stories.

That said, she may be a bit too late to the party. Marjorie Taylor Greene, Matt Gaetz, Lauren Boebert et al. have established themselves as the unchallenged leaders of the congressional kookaburra (Q-kaburra?) caucus. Sarah is old news.

I know this because I read the newspapers. All of ‘em, Katie.

It made comedian Sarah Silverman say, “THIS IS FUCKING BRILLIANT,” and prompted author Stephen King to shout “Pulitzer Prize!!!” (on Twitter, that is). What is it? The viral letter that launched four hilarious Trump-trolling books. Get them all, including the finale, Goodbye, Asshat: 101 Farewell Letters to Donald Trump, at this link. Or, if you prefer a test drive, you can download the epilogue to Goodbye, Asshat for the low, low price of FREE. 

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